Healthy Mind Heart Body

Longing vs Anticipation

We’ve said it a thousand times – I miss you. I miss you can mean many things but is generally an expression of longing, of lack and hunger. I miss you is an expression of pain and suffering.

Missee

I’ve heard it said that we all want to be missed.  We like to be missed.

Reflect on this pleasure in another’s pain. It is romantic to feel incomplete without your partner, lost without your love.  It is a destructive feedback cycle for us to enjoy being missed.  Any expression of appreciation, intentional or inadvertent, for another to suffer our absence psychologically encourages them to feel more pain.

Misser

But I miss them!  Even the act of missing someone is unfavorable.  You destroy the opportunity to appreciate the present and worst of all are tying negative experience into your imaginations developing experience of the object of your longing.

Don’t miss them.  Anticipate or otherwise reflect optimistically on the potential of your reunion.  Enjoy the now, free of longing, free of suffering the absence of your counterpart, and indulge in the occasional anticipation, preparation and expression of your excitement to be reunited with your love absentee.

Don’t miss. Anticipate and appreciate.

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Geoffrey Hale

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Comments

2 responses to “Longing vs Anticipation”

  1. heidischwab Avatar
    heidischwab

    Missing someone is your heart’s way of reminding you that you love them. The pain of missing someone and the pleasure of loving someone so much, to miss them, are two sides of the same coin. I would rather someone I love not feel the pain of missing me, but I know that if they love me, they probably do.

    I believe the want for someone to miss us comes from want for reassurance of love. Physical distance has a way of amplifying such feelings and want. I know that my mind and heart naturally feel longing, lack and hunger for my missee. The optimistic spin you’ve outlined is much more constructive and beneficial to all involved. I think key is also communicating feelings of love and anticipation.

    I will put this into conscious practice.

    Thank you for valuable, positive twist!

    After further contemplation, “I miss you” is an extremely loaded statement, in my experience and use of the words.

    This sentiment has my mind racing, atm.

    Reply
  2. "I Miss You" Is An Invitation

    […] the surface level, “I miss you” is an expression of longing for, lack of, or hunger for someone I care about, and am […]

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